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GRINDR – A VERY DANGEROUS GAY APP USED BY PRIESTS.

Many Irish priests, religious and monks are addicted to the very dangerous Gay app called Grindr.

One Northern Ireland priest recently told me of his horrific experience on Grindr.

He got talking to a man from the Lisburn Road in Belfast and travelled a considerable journey to meet the man. They had agreed to have anal sex with the priest being the “bottom” and the man being the “top”.

But when the priest arrived at the house the man had a BDSM room in his house.

He immediately tied up the priest and beat him to a pulp and then threw him in a rear passage beside dust bins.

The priest also lost his phone and wallet and ended up in hospital.

He was too embarrassed to go to the police and ruin his own reputation.

Afterwards, sadly, he continued to use Grindr πŸ₯Ί

AND

This week I was talking to another man who suffered greatly through Grindr.

Some nasty people on Grindr stole his information and pictures and placed them on a paedophilia web site and informed the police.

After a very painful nine months his name was cleared. But he lost his job and has suffered serious physical and mental challenges and a litany of threats and abuse from neighbours.

Grindr featured hugely in the Maynooth “summer of love”.

It also featured in the downfall of number of fairly high profile priests.

Grindr is NOT men looking for love, companionship, a partner or emotional bonding.

Grindr is about men looking for wild, irresponsible, anonymous sex.

It is also about the dark side of gay sex – assault, rape, violence, humiliation etc.

No half decent man would want that, surely?

And why would a priest, monk or seminarian want to get involved in such a “meat market”.

Are people not better than that?

Are priests not better than that?

Gentlemen and Reverend Gentlemen especially should avoid Grindr.

76 replies on “GRINDR – A VERY DANGEROUS GAY APP USED BY PRIESTS.”

8.48
I have well past the Big school.
However went to a Bigger campus called university.
You see I am too young to have got a leaving cert.
:):):)
God Bless and I am most Grateful for a Catholic education.
Sadly your Education would not fit in the the Catholic Ethos as we teach hope, Faith and Love and the Greatest’s of these is LOVE.
Sadly your hatred is noticed by everyone daily.

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11:16am
Sadly it’s apparent that you never past the Inter. Cert. never mind the Leaving. As for being at University you’re having a joke aren’t you. Sadly your ignorance is noticed by everyone daily. God Bless!

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2.59
I do not know why I even answer you maybe it is out of my knowledge of the Beatitudes.
however I will just keep doing what His Holiness Pope Francis said this Eastertide and constantly says Pray for the oppressors so God Bless you and may the Holy Spirit guide you.

This Sunday is Divine Mercy Sunday and may you obtain some Divine Mercy in your life.

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I am to young for all this inter. cert and Leaving cert well before my time and I do not even know what it means.
It was O Grades and Higher Grades also Sixth Year Studies.

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Pat, you are well informed!! Apart from the obvious dangers attached to random meetings with total strangers, the underworld of gay culture and practices, like what you’ve mentioned, is a morally bankrupt place. Sex is a commodity for too many hookers, pimps and abusers and the inherent potential of being seriously hurt, ruined and damaged which some Apps carry and which have been highlighted, are warnings which all should be aware of. Some men are just deranged sexually. The gift sex and sexual intimacy is completely devalued and dehumanized when we give ourselves away to strangers. Sadly, young chikdren and young teenagers are exposed to equally sinister people through their mobile phones. Any man or woman who is looking for true intimacy will rarely be fulfilled by Apps like grinde. Who wants to meet a sado masochist who presents as a charmer?

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Do you fools have any idea what you look like with this bitching at each other, ridiculously followed by ‘God bless’?

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I’m glad you’re gone I can finally breathe!
I’m glad you’re gone, I can try and be me!
I can feel it in my chest, This isn’t over yet!
Check the locks, shut the windows down!
Pat Buckley’s back in town!
Danger knockin’ at my door!
Don’t come round round here no more!
I check the locks, shut the windows down!
Pat Buckley’s back in town!

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Dear Bishop Pat,
Thank you for this enlightening post. Loneliness, the lack of fraternity in the priesthood today, and bishops who are more of a CEO than a shepherd can induce clerics to make poor choices. When affirmation and support is lacking from the chancery, clerics often seek it in inappropriate ways and in dangerous locations. In the end, the cleric ends up feeling even more disillusioned, demoralized, and depressed. Unfortunately, priestly brotherhood appears to be as much of a myth as fairies and unicorns. Even if only one cleric or seminarian deletes Grindr from his favorite device, your post has added to the sum total of good in our world.

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‘When affirmation and support is lacking from the chancery, clerics often seek it in inappropriate ways and in dangerous locations.’
How much affirmation and support do you think real people get?
But they still have to take responsibility for making adult decisions.
You can always tell the clerical spongers on here.

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β€˜β€™Many Irish priests, religious and monks are addicted to the very dangerous Gay app called Grindr’’
Bishop Buckley, so you have any relevant sources? Thank You

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Is this why some resort to gay saunas? Safety in having others around? Presumably there are rules in establishments.

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The Russian Orthodox tradition, which goes back centuries, insists that priests must be married. There are three basic reasons for this: Gay priests are seriously unwanted, the priest’s wife should make sure that her husband doesn’t misbehave sexually -and she protects him from being controlled by any psychologically manipulative female parishioners. OTOH, bishops have to be celibate -so you have to be a monk to become one eventually. That may be a reason why Russia has been the stronghold of Christian monasticism. Given that, Russian monks have never had anything to do with running parishes or teaching children -and Russian monasteries imprison sexually errant monks.
The RC church is already abandoning priestly celibacy; if you want to become a married RC priest, just become an Anglican one and then convert with your wife.

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Though I have great respect for the Orthodox tradition, it too has its dark side; not only extreme expressions of nationalism, but an OTT attitude towards homosexuality which suggests that not all is plain sailing on that front. Incidentally, I think marriage is not compulsory for priests, though it is the norm, and a priest cannot marry after ordination.

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Marriage is compulsory for Oriental Orthodox parochial clergy but not for Eastern Orthodox.

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Thank you for pointing out the utter cynicism with which some people approach orders in your last line. Disgusting.
It is reasonable to expect anyone seeking orders in any church to seek them sincerely and without the view to something else.
My own dream about the Christian community and its clergy is that it should be marked by those who seek the Lord in sincerity and integrity.

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Dear Bishop Pat
Grindr is what it is. A way for gay men to meet and have sex – as with all these things it will have its dark side but the truth is lots of gay men use it successfully to hook up and have, and enjoy, casual sex and I know 1 couple who met through it.
And, as shocking as it may be, there are quite a few apps which facilitate casual sex among heterosexuals – and shock horror they are enjoyed by men and women. I’m sure they have their dark underside too.
My point is though – don’t demonise Grindr as a dangerous app.
If you have a social media presence at all, unscrupulous people can steal your pics and info and effectively your identity. Such are the perils of the internet not just Grindr.
Gay men have always had ways of identifying other gay men – the gay scene – gay personals etc – these were equally fraught with the possibility of encountering dangerous or unsavoury characters – such is life.
If you were to be honest about the journey to find your own partner, I’m sure you used various β€˜dating’ facilities and opportunities. i.e you used a version of Grindr in a pre digital world – so I find something a little but hypocritical in your attack on the β€˜evils’ of Grindr.
However , I do take your point about it not being a suitable place for catholic priests given their current teaching on celibacy and sexuality in general. These men are nothing more than hypocrites.
At least Grindr is what it is – a gay app facilitating sex between consenting adults – there is nothing evil about it.
On the other hand Catholic priests who espouse one set of values while practicing another – having the ability to influence young impressionable minds – telling them that their sexual inclination is intrinsically evil while indulging in that type of casual sexual activity – now, that is evil.
An occasional Grindr user.

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I suppose apps like Grindr etc. are a bit more comfortable than having to go out in the cold and the rain around al fresco cruising sites, where you have a good chance of being beaten up or arrested by the police on a sweep ? Or being noticed by the parishioners around local beauty / cruising spots, and having to pretend to be walking the dog !

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Do you remember years ago when Maggie Thatcher made the BBC tune out the Sinn Fein-ers ? Well, she should’t have bothered, because we could barely understand them anyway. I was reminded of this over the last few days watching NI people from all sides being interviewed, and having to resort to the lagging subtitles to understand what they were saying ! Which points to this business of NI being part of the UK. It isn’t ! On this side of the water we have no sense of NI as being a real part of the UK, or Northern Irelanders being anything other than a) Irish b) Northern Irish or c ) just bloody, cantankerous, argumentative and prickly people. Certainly not British. I mean, they don’t even speak like us ! Having got that little bit of xenophobic prejudice off my chest, and looking at the situation a little more objectively, I am always taken by the fact that the Sinn Fein people are so much cleverer, nuanced, persuasive and strategic than the Unionists. They run rings around the Unionists, who are always seeming to be reactive and playing catch up. I have no doubt that there are deep seated issues at the root of what is currently happening, but I have no doubt that Unionists in NI have had their noses put out of joint by the practicalities, and especially the implications, of the Brexit border protocol, and in particular the fact that BoJo has been willing and able to sell them down the river in a deluge of lies and failed promises. Mind you, the DUP don’t have a particularly respectable history in this Brexit matter, relishing holding the British government to ransom under May over Brexit and squeezing billions out of her for their support, and this when a majority of people in NI voted against Brexit. They don’t like it now when Johnson and others have dumped them and betrayed them. Perhaps they should be wary of what they wish for – be it Brexit, or continuing unionism, whatever – because Boris, Sin Fein, well in fact pretty much anybody, is much more clever than them and will dance around them. Poor things, don’t they realise how ridiculous they look and sound ?

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Anon@9:59. Having lived in England since 1970 for 40+ years before returning to N. Ire, I agree entirely with your comment on how N. Ire is viewed by majority in Britain. Your perception of Unionists dilemma is also spot on.
It will be interesting to see the results of the recent census as the religio-politico demography changes here in the North. The worrying thing is the Unionist siege mentality for what they see as betrayal, and as your comments acknowledge, their failure by poor quality political representation.
MMM

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As a follow on, there’s an excellent analysis in the Guardian online today by Jonathan Freeland. I’d recommend a read for anyone trying to understand the current issues.
MMM

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Well well. The wheel has gone all the way round. I believe clerical willies are of the same ontological standing as others of the common or garden variety. The issue is usability accountability and responsibility.

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HOW-HI FLY.

Bethehokeys hi so clerical willies are not ontologically altered but have
the same standing as the unaltered willies of Joe Blow John Doe or Joe Bloggs.
Aye fly there’s plenty of issues to consider in the
willie department, particularly the clerical depot.
Other issues might include ability availability and affability
none of which are covered or even half covered in formation.
What’s the God take on grindr…
May The Force Be With Us.+
Bye Bye Fly Hi.

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Formation??? This may be where the willies are introduced to the outside world but the mind is shielded from reality. Keep it country

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HOW-HI FLY.
And the top of the morning to you.
Begorra hi formation is putting a shape on something but if shaped
in a hothouse or in the land of make believe then a half baked
anything will have problems galore in the real world.
As Johnny the man in black Cash sang
they’ll burn burn burn in a ring of fire.
Rock on Fly and have a good day.
May The Force Be With Us.+
Bye Bye Fly Hi.

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Perhaps any priest sexually assaulted by a hook up on Grindr would do well to reflect that how he feels is exactly how the children abused by his colleagues felt, and that this was then covered up and facilitated on a policy level by the church.
He would then not only be in a better position to understand the importance of safeguarding and would finally get the impact of abuse on someone’s life.
If you think this comment is extreme, that merely demonstrates the impact of abuse.
And if you’re all going to start screaming at me that I’m a hater, reflect that you are in the position of parents who don’t believe children because the holy priest would never do such a thing.

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10:55 am

On the contrary, your comment is not extreme but understates the impact of abuse on children,especially young children. Children lack the cognitive development maturity to process sexual abuse. The impact of abuse is therefore appalling. When a child is sexually abused by a priest spiritual abuse simultaneously occurs.

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A terrible story Bp Pat; people should be cautious of using these type of apps. Of course, I am too old now, so I don’t know what I’d be like, but I think priests would be better just visiting the gents as they used to do.

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A Monsignor from East Anglia diocese was interrupted by the police midway through the act with a barrister in public toilets in the early 1990s. Thanks to Tony Blair, I don’t think the police loiter around toilets anymore looking for opportunities to arrest gays in action – so maybe it’s safe for clerics to head back to them now. If the car wanker priest had done it in a public loo he would still have been a PP. I had a curate who always in the public loo in the next town which had a glory hole. He’d come back smelling of sex and with blue lips from overdoing the poppers…

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Any priest or religious who is using Grindr should have the integrity/moral honesty to acknowledge that their religious/priestly vocation has come to an end. They should do the honourable thing i.e. petition to be dispensed from their religious vows and, if they are priests the obligations of the clerical state.

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Belated Happy Birthday to Diarmuid Martin. April 8th 1945. I hope he still grinding away πŸ₯³
Will you be contacting him to wish him Happy Birthday Pat?

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Go on your dying to enlighten us of the Gossip.
Last week it was a supposed court case that never happened.
Wonder what it is today.
We all await.

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“Who Is Eligible to Become a Deacon?
Married Candidates:
The Church is concerned that there should be no potential for conflict between the responsibilities of ordained ministry and the need of a couple in the early years of their married life to devote their time and energy to maturing in their relationship and to caring for young children. For that reason, a married man must have reached the age of thirty five before he can be ordained to the permanent diaconate. He must also have the formal consent of his wife.
Unmarried Candidates:
Unmarried candidates must have reached the age of twenty five before they can be ordained as permanent deacons. In keeping with the tradition of the Church, those who are ordained as single men make a solemn promise of celibacy.”
My humble opinion on the above;
The criteria for the diaconate above are what I envisage the priesthood criteria should be too for both men and women.
Anyone taking a vow of celebacy should not be on apps seeking partners for any reason.
If someone has taken a vow of celebacy and they happen to meet someone. They should discern do they want to remain committed to their vow or else step away.

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There is a bottom line (ooh er) here which is never mentioned. What sort of man would publicly promise or vow celibacy and have apparently no intention of keeping this or fail to get out when he found he couldn’t keep his promise?
And they wonder why the public perception of a Catholic priest is of a corrupt, criminal spongers!

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Sure look at the amount of guys on gay dating apps in β€˜open relationships’. Divorce is twice as higher in the LGBT community. As Paris Hilton once said β€˜the problem with the gays is that they’re always horny’.

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Another bottom line consideration is how such a man can go through
six or seven years of priestly formation without detection by the formators?

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@Bishop Buckley

Your observation that those involved in the formation of the next generation of priests in seminaries are also sexually active and perhaps utilising Grindr are THE most accurate words you have ever written on this blog. In the past thirty years every President of Maynooth (seminary) has been somehow compromised and/or implicated in a sexual scandal. And the fact that the seminarian from Northern Ireland who allegedly was the other party on the altar receiving fellatio from a priest is indicative of how systemic things are under the watch of the current leadership of Maynooth. It is legitimate to ask how many other β€œsummers of love” occurred in Maynooth before what was going on in the seminary was brought into the public domain by you, Bishop Buckley? I think the honest answer is quite a few.

In Ireland, the reality is the priesthood has become a gay profession; it has been for the past fifteen years or so. The sexual orientation of individuals who have been ordained is inconsequential, but their inability to live the obligations of the diaconate/priesthood to which they have voluntarily committed their lives is troubling, and needs to be addressed as a matter of urgency. If you are priest with a profile on Grindr then you should be honest and leave.

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Every president of Maynooth?
Exaggeration is the last resort of the dishonest.
M.O’Donnell, D.Farrell, H. Connolly and M.Mullaney all carried and carry out their responsibilities humbly, humanely and with distinction.

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It is so sad for the granny grammar and spelling corrector sad that they have nothing else in life apart from missing the dream to be a school teacher.
great this blog keeps him occupied.
So just say a little prayer for him
God Bless

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@ 2.59pm

May I say that I think your comment was ill-advised. Correct grammar and spelling are a joy to behold. It’s use should be a virtue to which each one of us aspires. Mistakes will be made; dispute about the occasional stylistic preference will be encountered. The main point, however, is for us to strive towards excellence in the manner in which we craft our sentences into pleasing prose. My hope is that you will reflect on the cheap and ill-judged blather you have stupidly placed within the public realm. Apologise, please. Anybody with a love of liturgical discourse would understand my point and agree with it wholeheartedly. Thank you.

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2.59: You’re not, emmmm, a teacher, are you?? Wouldn’t like you as my teacher if you are…I like correct spellings and proper grammar. Granny and Grandad Grammar Inspectors are necessary.

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4.20
You back again living this dream.
Every Bishop in Scotland has direct email addresses and time and time again they have asked for the proof but none ever comes.
You Love your fame on this blog even although it is Anonymous it gives you a frill.

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@4.49pm

Of course, you are correct and I appreciate you pointing to my error. I am familiar with the approved use of the apostrophe but failed, which is very rare for me. My explanation, I think, has to be related to the fervour with which I approach this important subject. A slower, more considered approach would have been appropriate. I thank you for your guidance and admonition.

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6.01: Come out of the clouds!! As hard as you try to appear learned, your prose doesn’t exhibit such! Sorry, but that’s my very considered view. You do not have Chaucerian or Shakespearean ability. More Dandy and Beano gone all posh!!! ….πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‰πŸ€£πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜πŸ˜..

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Humpty Dumpty πŸ€€πŸ€€πŸ€€πŸ€€πŸ€“πŸ€“πŸ€“πŸ€“.says:

7.08: Honourable Aunty May – brilliant. Some commenters think they’re Pulitzer prize winners with their pseudo analysis…Thanks for the laughβ€¦πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ˜†πŸ˜†πŸ˜†πŸ˜…πŸ˜…..

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Monsignor mentioned at 1.11 pm has been suggested elsewhere in this blog, as potential Bishop for same diocese!

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Dear Bishop Patricia, I would like to make a complaint! I have have just clicked onto β€œTony” at the bottom right-hand-side of the β€œApp” which is featured at the top of this blog page – to my utter dismay and anticlimactic disappointment – β€œTony” did not β€œpop up, ”
is there a fault with the link provided, by any chance?
… In the meantime if you could please ask β€œTony” to contact me, directly, then I would be very much obliged!
Yours,
Sr. Precious Preston β€” c/o & falsum malicious prepatory – West Midlands

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