Since publishing my open letter to Fr. Ger Fitzgerald on this blog (April 2nd), I have been somewhat overwhelmed at the sheer number of comments. On the whole, most are very supportive, however, in an effort to be upfront and honest in describing my relationship with Fr. Ger, I have allowed myself to become the subject of ridicule, scorn and judgment by certain elements. Perhaps you wonder why I do not wish to reveal my true identity, but in light of the above, I think it best to continue using my pseudonym “Carole” for now.
I do not expect anyone to take sides between myself and Fr. Ger. What I do expect is that those reading this blog will understand the devastating impact Fr. Ger’s actions have had, not only on me, but also on Yvonne. To be clear; I am only speaking from my own experience; Yvonne did not ask me to write anything. I do this of my own volition, and with a desire to bring all that has happened out of the darkness and into the light.
Fr. Ger is an ordained RC priest in the Diocese of Killaloe—a diocese which I happen to be a parishioner in. When Fr. Ger first initiated contact with me in May 2020, he was still in a position of religious epistemic authority. When Fr. Ger had the affair with Yvonne, who also was a parishioner, he was in the exact same position of epistemic power/authority. A religious authority knows that they hold this authoritative position, they hold it by choice, and they are morally obliged to act in accordance with the religious teachings of the church. This statement forms the basis for my grievances against Fr. Ger.
Further to this, there are a few important points regarding Fr. Ger’s behaviour which I would like to briefly discuss here:
Ger, you often referred to Yvonne in your conversations with me as “Snakey Drakey”. I went along with it because I felt it wasn’t my place to correct you. I kept my mouth shut about a lot of things out of fear of having you get upset with me—my mistake…if you are always walking on eggshells around someone, it’s a sign that something is wrong. For keeping my mouth shut in regards to your moniker for Yvonne, I wish to take this opportunity to apologise to her. You also sent me screenshots of very personal messages between you and Yvonne because you wanted to prove that you had told her you were sorry. Saying you are sorry in a message is not sufficient. Ger. Why does it take a lay person to tell you that? Yvonne once made some comments (under “Anonymous” ) on Bishop Buckley’s blog (31.10.21), in which she wrote:
“Guards had to pull me away from river last night, litterly… [sic]”.
You, Fr. Ger, sent me a screenshot of that message and you texted underneath: “Have you ever read such bull in all your days…the same oul shite she sent me when she made everything public…”
Did you really think Yvonne was making it up Ger? A similar incident happened with me: When I texted you on 25.2.22, begging you for the umpteenth time to meet me in order to resolve our issues, you said you were “physically sick” and to leave you alone. That same evening, I told you by text that I was having suicidal thoughts and you did not respond at all to that message.
The very next day, I found you dining out in the Castleconnell café with one of your lady friends. I took your photo outside with your friend in order to keep as evidence that you were once again preoccupied with yourself and didn’t give a damn about my emotional state of mind. As a priest who was once entrusted with pastoral ministry, you have the moral duty and obligation to help others who are suffering. It is all part of that thing called “religious epistemic authority” which you knew about when you signed up to be a priest. Sure, you can give great sermons and brilliant lectures on theological matters in the New Testament, but why the hell did they not teach you at Maynooth how to have compassion on others? Is your own suffering so great that you can not take on board other people’s pain? Shouldn’t Yvonne and myself have been taken seriously? You tried to gaslight me all the time, Ger, and the irony here is that you yourself struggle with your own mental health. I could say a lot more on this subject, but best I desist…
Ger, you have let down a lot of people. I am not here to condemn you; none of us are without sin. We all make bad choices. What I want is for you to face the facts surrounding your appalling interactions with women parishioners and your serious breech of religious epistemic trust. My sincere hope is that you can learn from all of this and go on to bigger and better things outside of the church. As you told me once in a message, “The Best is Yet to Come”.
GER IS A SERIAL ABUSER OF WOMEN PARISHIONERS
******** LETTER FROM JK
Thank you for your letter and enclosures.
Masses will be offered.
I would be happy to give your son a full Wedding Mass which would also be fully legal.